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Actively show you are willing to expend your time and energy to make things better for your spouse. If you don’t know how, ask your partner: “What can I do to make things better?”
Be willing to work to re-earn the trust that has been damaged or broken by your offending actions or words. If you both have mutual interest in preserving the relationship, chances are good that your spouse will offer helpful suggestions.

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Tell your partner how witnessing his or her pain makes you feel. Let your spouse know that you are sad, disappointed, guilty, scared and regretful. Your partner needs to see and hear that you are affected; that you feel enough pain and remorse to avoid repeating the hurtful action.

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